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Zach Tartell
01-06-2009, 10:07 PM
*I was looking for a funny title, and so I used Wikipedia's random article button three times. Figured it'd be more fun than something boring like "REPORT."

#Yeah, I'm not gonna translate that. I love it when people put pretentious quotes at the start of their things, so I figured I'd follow suit. Deal with it.

First of all, I'd like to tell the Elgin brothers that I'm sorry that I missed their birthday, and wish them a happy belated one.

Secondly, if you don't care that I didn't top 8, don't bother reading (unless you like to hear the sound of my voice as much as I do, in which case, press on).

Thirdly, this event was probably my last one for a long while. I'll still troll around here when the time is right, but I won't be flaunting my silver tongue as often as I have in the past (you'll have to relay my apologies to your mom).

Fourth, since it's like four days after the event I'm sure somebody's gonna ask which event I'm writing about, so I'll just clarify: Beta Tundra event, Syracuse, NY, 3 January 2009.

REPORT TIME:
Like in September I decided that I'd like to start playing Jack Elgin decks. You guys know me. I love me some "screw blue" decks, and he seems to build some of the most efficient ones. But what to play?

I hadn't made a decision until after the Source event, where I saw that Team America and Dreadstill would be played a bunch more often. So... nothing with fetches. That left me with Wombat or the vastly superior Mighty Quinn. At which point I commissioned Clemens "DIF" Wolf to hook me up with some sweet, German-style Snow-Covered Plains. They're freaking excellent, btw. I'd say as hot as they come, save perhaps Jap Foil (although new face is the terribleness).

I stole a handful of foily things from my teammates, and came up with this list:

18 Snow-Covered plains
4 Scrying Sheets
4 Sensei's Diving Top
3 Enlightened Tutor
3 Eternal Dragon
3 Runed Halo
3 Oblivion Ring
1 Moat
2 Isochron Scepter
1 Sacred Mesa
2 Grindstone
2 Painter's Servant
4 Orim's Chant
3 Abeyance
4 Swords to Plowshares
3 Wrath of God
Sideboard:
3 Ray of Distortion
2 Story Circle
2 Decree of Justice
1 Sacred Mesa
1 Sacred Ground
2 Tormod's Crypt
1 Relic of the Prodeginitadlafjaldkfjq;wlnma;lkvja;dlsfkja;
1 Abeyance
1 Rule of Law
1 Hanna's Custody (this was TERRIBLE. Don't waste your two dollars one one)

Without any more banter, let me get onto how I played this monstrosity:

Round 1: Matt Abold, GBwr Survival (no wish)
Game 1: Matt and I have a lot of playing back and forth - Matt gets a turn 2 Survival, I get a turn 3 Oblivion ring before he can activate it, I have like 100 wraths when I need them (<3 top) for Matt's creatures, he has discard to cut me off of the combo. We get to a point where I have dumped Anger into Matt's 'yard, I have 4 life, and he plays a Dark Confidant on me then passes the turn. He swings in (after I deal with the Confidant) for two damage with a Quirion Ranger and Squee in later turns (remembering the Anger), but that two damage would have killed me if he'd not forgotten it. I seal it with a CHANT LOCK on turn twelve or so.
Game 2: Matt knocks 4 cards out of my hand with 2 Thoughtsiezes and a Cabal Therapy, then plays 3 Tarmogoyfs in three turns. I'll give him this one.
Game 3: I get a CHANT LOCK on Matt for a while until he draws a grip. By then a Decree for 4 beats Matt to 8. He plays some dudes, I play a moat, then a Dragon and some Mesa tokens. Combat math is checked when we go into turns and I'll beat him by precisely the right amount.

2-1
1-0-0

Austin (FROM AUBURN, NY)(YOU FOOLS! THIS MEANS HE KNOWS KYLE HUMPHRY!!!!! AND HIS DCI RATING IS LIKE A 1834 OR SOMETHING ELSE WICKED SIGNIFICANT!!!!!!1!!eleven), with Ur Dreadstill:
Game 1: I get quick Halos on Mishra's Factory (and then Austin draws 3) and Phyrexian Dreadnought, but a Trinket Mage is enough to beat me to death after Counterbalance hits the table. I scoop it up.
Game 2: A Moat and a handful of Chants make me live forever. Wipe Away + Force (and Counterbalance on my Chant, maybe) answers that, though. I die pretty quickly to an onslaught of 3 Factory Workers.

HIGHLIGHT OF THE DAY:
I paid 10 mana to blow up two Counterbalances. Best two Disenchants I've ever played.

0-2
1-1-0

I get matched up against Eli Kassis (sp?). I put him on the best deck buildable, 'cause he owns a freaking nerd card store.
Game 1: I keep a hand with Stone + Servant. But Eli drops a Mire on me and passes the turn. I put him on Team America, lead with a Top (to avoid Daze) instead of going for the turn 3 win. Eli fetches an Undergound, duresses me (taking the 'stone), drops a fetch, and passes. I rip another Stone like a champ, and play it. My next turn I play Servant on Black (still expecting Snuff Out). Eli plays 10,000 rituals, Ill Gotten Gains, and I tap top in hopes of having a Chant that wasn't in my top 3 cards when I looked that same turn. Frown town.
Game 2: I board in the 4th Abeyance, a Rule of Law, and a couple Crypts (over stupid spot removal). I land a Rule of Law, have 3 Chant effects when Eli duresses me the turn after, and ride it out for the long game. Eli wishes for and plays Empty the Warrens over two turns (for two). I respond by Decreeing for 6, I think, and that's all she wrote.
Game 3: I have another 2 Chants in hand when Eli duresses me (and he accuses me of savagery)(I'll take this moment to hate on the Virginians for not coming. I got like 0 high fives all day.), then land CHANT LOCK after Eli burning wishes for Ponder (off of a Lotus Petal - he kept a 1-lander and didn't find any more mana). He scoops (as his only answers are some number of Serenities).

Eli gives me the win 2-0 as he's gonna drop.
2-0 (secret loss omitted)
2-1-0

Round 4: Bryan Fynlasen-Schuler's UGb tempo Thresh
Game 1: This was hilarious. There's a picture of me with a shit-eating grin when Bryan Thoughtsiezes me. My hand? 3 Orim's Chant, 2 Abeyance, 1 Painter Servant, 1 Snow-Plains. Serious lulz. I chant through a Moat around turn eight or ten. Bryan scoops (no Tombstalker).
Game 2: I mull to 6, win with Mesa Tokens (like a hundred of them). My notes for this game were sketchy.

2-0
3-1-0

Round 5: Joe (from CT maybe) with GBW Survival
Game 1: I get beat by some serious Tarmogoyf action while topping into 3 Wraths in a row. It was great. Joe rebuilds with Genesis, Vials, and multiple Witnesses. I bait Joe into using his Harmonic Sliver on a Runed Halo on something, then O-Ring his Sliver (praying he didn't run any more enchantment hate main) and drop a Moat. A Faerie Macabre beats me down to 4 before I find a Swords, and then Joe asks what my win is. I offer to play it out, but he scoops when he Duresses me and sees something (a Painter's Servant maybe).
Game 2: I get a turn 4 CHANT LOCK, but I worry like the whole game. Joe eats my Dragons with that Faerie Macabre a couple times, and then I Chant on my turn and Grindstone him out with Painter (I love having like 1000 mana). Joe admits sheepishly that he doesn't play Krosan Grips (just another Harmonic and a Veridian Zealot in the board).

2-0
4-1-0

Round 6: Lam Phan's UGr Tempo Thresh (OH SNAP WE'RE THE FEATURE MATCH)
Game 1: I get some quick Halos on Lam's wincons, then get nine mana, Chant (countered), Chant, Painter, Stone, win.
Game 2: Lam finds 2 Goyfs and beats me to death.
Game 3: Same deal. I don't want to make his wins seem trivial (game 2 I was manascrewed), but he made tight plays, and kicked my ass. I can't bitch about that.

1-2
4-2-0

Round 7: Zach Fine (Ichorid)
Well, I have another opportunity to knock Zach out of prizes (I did the same thing at the Trop Event, I think).
Game 1: Zach mulls to 6 (other Zach, not me, you idiots). I Abeyance him on his turn after my turns 2 and 3, then get a CHANT LOCK on him turn four. G4m3z0rz
Game 2: Zach keeps a hand of seven. He Careful Studies out a Golgari Thug, then passes the turn. I have a chant so I go Plains, pass. He dredges into nothing spectacular, passes. I tutor endstep for Relic, draw and play it (I'm holding another Tutor in my hand). Zach cracks an LED for threshold, then activates a Coliseum. I relic in response, drawing into a Crypt (insert Dave Gearhart looking over my shoulder, seeing the draw, and then high-fiving me into oblivion). He draws a Stinkweed Imp and pitches it. The blow-by-blow is pretty boring. I burn his yard 3 times, beat him to death with 2 Dragons. I feel like it was a pretty decisive victory. Zach's mistake? Dropping a Needle on Grindstone instead of Crypt (he'd totally have won if he had done this, at least game 2).

2-0
5-2-0

Good enough for 12th place.

EXTENDED PROPS AND SLOPS:
Since it's gonna be my last event for a while I mise-well make it fun, right?

Props:

Colin first, this time. 'Cause both he and Jim kept the dream alive, only Colin did a better job of it this time than either of us.
Jim
Altered - your events are fun, even if you won't let me pee in your bathroom.
Adam, for hooking me up with sweet foil versions of stuff I didn't own.
Rich Borque, his awkward, baby-horse-standing-up-for-the-first-time style of Legacy play
Canadians, 'cause they took home some serious loot. Although I suppose that's to be expected, 'cause they live in a tundra, right?
Clemens, for making sure I had the pimpest manabase possible
Jack Elgin, for making Quinn
Dave Elrod, for having the uncanny ability to give decks the best name ever (Quinn = "The Deck that Jack Elgin Built")
Ah-hah, for Take Me On
CHANT LOCK!!!!!!!!!
Barak Obama, for being in the Heroes season 3 finale
Eli, for being a classy gentleman and giving me the full win
Jason Korrigan (sp?), for being the funnest Judge I've ever had occasion to have
BlitzkrEIg guys
lulz @ your hoodies

Ray Robilliard, for a pimp type 4 Stack, excellent methods of randomization, and general awesomeness
Chuck, for doing some sweet event coverage
Geoffrey Beffrey Smelski, for being one classy mofo to sit next to occasionally
Raider Bob and that guy from The Grid Games, for thinking that The Deck That Jack Elgin Built was cool
Rick Argerierierierierio, for making it out (and having a last name that gets one syllable longer each time we meet)
Flux in between rounds


Slops:

Albany (at least Albany that didn't come)
Getting matched up against team members round 1
Not being able to kill my own Patrick Star with Spungebob Squarepants
Pokemon

Nah, dude. I'm not into Pokemon.

Hammerfist, for promising me Chants and then not showing up
Virginia. I know that 3-16 only got packs, but it would be nice to see you more often
Mike Edinger, for his girl parts


It's been real, guys. And I'll still see you around the internet and such, but it may very well never be the same. Remember, it's not you - it's me.

TeenieBopper
01-06-2009, 10:16 PM
Mike Edinger, for his girl parts


Wait, what? What'd I do?

Bryant Cook
01-06-2009, 10:32 PM
When you die, can I stuff you?

Good report, needs more me in the props.

cdr
01-06-2009, 10:32 PM
For future reference, someone can't give you the 2-0 win if you lost a game. Doing so is knowing you can't is cheating; Eli is a level 1 judge and experienced player so he ought to know.

quicksilver
01-06-2009, 10:41 PM
Virginia. I know that 3-16 only got packs, but it would be nice to see you more often

Seriously none of us draft so packs are completly worthless to us. If you want us to come give prizes to more than just the top 2. We would have totally been there if it wasn't packs for prizes.

Bryant Cook
01-06-2009, 10:42 PM
Suck it up.

Pinder
01-06-2009, 11:12 PM
Wait, what? What'd I do?

You ordered a cosmo. Am I the only one who remembers this?

NANTUKO_SHADY
01-06-2009, 11:13 PM
Suck it up.



Dave's pretty good at that. :wink:

Bardo
01-06-2009, 11:18 PM
Great report. I watched your match vs. Lam on the live-feed and you killed me; esp. the deals you working out while sideboarding. :)

Re: your deck. Seems to be suffering from an extreme lack of Islands.

Anyway, well done.

J.V.
01-07-2009, 01:26 AM
Hammerfist, for promising me Chants and then not showing up
Zach Tartell, :cry: You asked me for chants for Hadley, no this tournament.

TheInfamousBearAssassin
01-07-2009, 02:44 AM
Not enough Jack El-

Wait, no. I guess that was a sufficient amount.

Yeah, Thresh with red is such a ridiculously harder matchup than normal Thresh.

Was this game recorded? Can I still watch it somewhere?

Anyway. Grats on the almost Top 8. Yeah, I apologize on the Custody, I was just trying it out when I sent the list. The sideboard needs some sort of life gain. Faith's Fetters? Recumbent Bliss? Genju of the Fields?

Hm. Y'know, Warmth could also come in against a lot of combo and Goblins. That's a thought.



For future reference, someone can't give you the 2-0 win if you lost a game. Doing so is knowing you can't is cheating; Eli is a level 1 judge and experienced player so he ought to know.

Tsk tsk. (http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_is_the_true_meaning_of_Christmas)

spirit of the wretch
01-07-2009, 06:47 AM
Great report! Grats for almost getting there.

And as nobody else wants to say it:

Lieber bleiben wir arm denn blutbefleckt
probs for the reference =)

quicksilver
01-07-2009, 10:04 AM
The sideboard needs some sort of life gain. Faith's Fetters? Recumbent Bliss? Genju of the Fields

Pulse of the fields?

Ebinsugewa
01-07-2009, 10:29 AM
Zach not coming to Hadley?

Illissius
01-07-2009, 11:29 AM
UW Landstill sometimes uses Ajani. Though Quinn can't make much use of the second ability.

Whit3 Ghost
01-07-2009, 11:33 AM
It was a pleasure sitting a match over from you a couple times.
Good luck with the whole teaching thing.

Gogo 10 mana Disenchants!!1

TheInfamousBearAssassin
01-07-2009, 12:42 PM
I hope that wasn't sarcasm. I've been very happy with Ray of Revelation. pwns the mirror match, let me tell you what.

@Ajani, Pulse: I meant a one of that could be tutored for. Although, having 2-3 Ajanis would supplement the DoJ/Mesa plan.

Adan
01-07-2009, 12:59 PM
At which point I commissioned Clemens "DIF" Wolf to hook me up with some sweet, German-style Snow-Covered Plains. They're freaking excellent, btw. I'd say as hot as they come, save perhaps Jap Foil (although new face is the terribleness).

And guess who he comissioned to get them? That sucker doen't have a bank account and thus called me to get them for him like "pwease, can you buy them for me, I fail at having a bank account and I get APAC Lands for them!"

Credits go to Team SPOD!


@Ajani, Pulse: I meant a one of that could be tutored for.

...Honden of Cleansing Fire?

Nightmare
01-07-2009, 01:50 PM
...Honden of Cleansing Fire?

Does anyone else REALLY want this deck to turn into Ninja Strike?

Adan
01-07-2009, 01:55 PM
Does anyone else REALLY want this deck to turn into Ninja Strike?

No, but it actually does the same like Ajani (2 Life per turn) and is tutorable, thus fulfills all the requirements stated above. Whether I meant it seriously is another thing, lol.

freakish777
01-07-2009, 06:06 PM
It's like I'm in the movies!

Best part of the entire day.

Zach Tartell
01-07-2009, 07:48 PM
Zach Tartell, :cry: You asked me for chants for Hadley, no this tournament.

Meh. I expect everybody to read my mind.


Not enough Jack El-

Wait, no. I guess that was a sufficient amount.

Yeah, Thresh with red is such a ridiculously harder matchup than normal Thresh.

Was this game recorded? Can I still watch it somewhere?

Anyway. Grats on the almost Top 8. Yeah, I apologize on the Custody, I was just trying it out when I sent the list. The sideboard needs some sort of life gain. Faith's Fetters? Recumbent Bliss? Genju of the Fields?

Hm. Y'know, Warmth could also come in against a lot of combo and Goblins. That's a thought.

-Damn straight
-I can't see it being that much harder. I didn't see the Fire//Ices, so I suppose he could have burned me out over Moat or something, but I'm fairly sure that if I'd drawn more than seven land between games 2 and 3 I'd've been a'ight.
-No. You can PM me for details, but I wrote pretty much everything that happened. Lam had savage hands and played it solidly.
-Custody suxx0r3d hard. I'm dissapointed in you. But I just picked up a foil Faith's Fetters, so even though I talked down on some guy for suggesting it I'll try it in testing
-Warmth? Really? TES can win without red mana (or just storm up two or three more spells) if we let them get to turn six or so (4+1 or 2 for Chant/Abeyance), and I just dropped a train on Goblins in testing.


Zach not coming to Hadley?

ICU81MI? (No, sir, I will not be attending)


And guess who he comissioned to get them? That sucker doen't have a bank account and thus called me to get them for him like "pwease, can you buy them for me, I fail at having a bank account and I get APAC Lands for them!"

Credits go to Team SPOD!


Meh, apples, oranges, et cetera. I think an eighteen year-old talking down on a seventeen year-old is something I'm obligated to break up in the hallway if I see it happening.

Still, I appreciate it. Must've been a pretty sweet deal to hear.


Best part of the entire day.

Oh, shit. I totally forgot about this. Was this when I was thoughtsiezed by BFS and he saw the 5 chants? Or against Eli when I never had less than three in my hand?

Anyway, ridiculously fun event.

freakish777
01-07-2009, 08:16 PM
Oh, shit. I totally forgot about this. Was this when I was thoughtsiezed by BFS and he saw the 5 chants? Or against Eli when I never had less than three in my hand?

This was when Eli Seized you and saw ETutor, Chant, Chant, Isochron Scepter, Runed Halo, Runed Halo, Abeyance.